


Chinese Food

by lol-phan-af (lol_phan_af)



Series: 1-800-did-I-ask [21]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Modern AU, Multi, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-07-13 21:31:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7138046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lol_phan_af/pseuds/lol-phan-af
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>more like HUNKules: we love you tho</p><p>johnn: love you too</p><p>more like HUNKules: even if you are the smolest</p><p>johnn: FUCK YOU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chinese Food

**johnn** : ITS RAINING WHO WANTS TO COME OUTSIDE AND MAKE OUT WITH ME  
  
**laf** : are you just standing outside in the rain hoping that one of us is going to come out  
  
**johnn** : MAYBE  
  
**laf** : you're going to get sick  
  
**johnn** : not if yoU COME OUTSIDE AND MAKE OUT WITH ME  
  
**laf** : that would just make me get sick  
  
**johnn** : not if we'RE CAREFUL  
  
**laf** : I don't think that's how it works  
  
**johnn** : WHERE ARE OUR BOYFRIENDS SO I CAN ASK THEM TO MAKE OUT IN THE RAIN WITH ME BC /SOMEONE HERE/ WONT  
  
**laf** : in the shower  
  
**johnn** : that makes sense  
  
**johnn** : PLEASE MAKE OUT IN THE RAIN WITH ME  
  
**laf** : ARE YOU GOING TO KEEP ASKING ME  
  
**johnn** : UNTIL ALEX AND HERCULES GET OUT OF THE SHOWER  
  
**johnn** : WHICH TAKES FOREVER  
  
**laf** : I don't want to get dressed tho  
  
**johnn** : iTS LIKE FIVE MINUTES OUT HERE  
  
**laf** : ugghghghghhg fine  
  
**laf** : give me a minute to find pants  
  
**johnn** : OH MY GOD I LO V E Y OU  
  
**laf** : yeah yeah yeah  
  
**laf** : love you too  
  
**johnn** : :^)))))))  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : I would've made out w/ you in the rain tf  
  
**little lion** : oh wow they are home and doing a lot more than making out

 **little lion:** well idk they're still making out but it's like,,,,,foreplay now  
  
**more like HUNKules** : where are you  
  
**little lion** : I was in the spare room looking for new sheets bc there's cracker crumbs in ours and I come out and lafayette has their legs wrapped around john's waist and john is holding them against the wall  
  
**more like HUNKules** : wait what  
  
**little lion** : come out and look  
  
**more like HUNKules** : oh shit  
  
**little lion** : this is weird  
  
**little lion** : like I feel creepy  
  
**more like HUNKules** : yeah same actually  
  
**johnn** : IF YOU COULD NOT DO THIS  
  
**little lion** : well I mean you two are about to do each other so that leaves me and hercules at kind of a loss  
  
**johnn** : you don't have to be at a loss  
  
**more like HUNKules** : oH  
  
**little lion** : but like this is your post making out in the rain sex  
  
**little lion** : that's special  
  
**johnn** : just get the fuck over here  
  
**little lion** : okay  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : john's skin is so cold still  
  
**johnn** : you can talk right  
  
**little lion** : no  
  
**johnn** : oh my god  
  
**little lion** : it's fine it's fine  
  
**johnn** : YOU CANT SPEAK  
  
**little lion** : BUT IT WAS 10/10  
  
**johnn** : I don't understand how you're so content at losing your voice  
  
**little lion** : bc blowjobs are fun  
  
**johnn** : I  
  
**johnn** : I have to give you that  
  
**little lion** : oh that's not all you gave me  
  
**johnn** : I want a divorce  
  
**little lion** : :^(((((((  
  
\---  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we have spent most of the day in bed  
  
**little lion** : I know I like it  
  
**more like HUNKules** : same but I'm starving  
  
**little lion** : same  
  
**laf** : same  
  
**johnn** : same  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I kind of want chinese food  
  
**little lion** : yeS  
  
**laf** : I am For It  
  
**johnn** : I'll order it if you go and get it  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I don't want to go alone tho  
  
**little lion** : I can barely walk  
  
**johnn** : jesus fCUk alex  
  
**little lion** : I am not lying  
  
**more like HUNKules** : oh my g o d  
  
**laf** : I'll go with you  
  
**more like HUNKules** : thank you  
  
**laf** : no problem my dear hercules  
  
**more like HUNKules** : :^)))))))  
  
**little lion** : does someone want to literally carry me to the living room  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I'll do it  
  
**little lion** : god bless  
  
**johnn** : you're an actual mess  
  
**little lion** : order the food john  
  
**johnn** : right  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : john has a really nice stomach  
  
**laf** : are you just staring at his stomach while he's making this call  
  
**little lion** : yeah  
  
**laf** : okay well same  
  
**more like HUNKules** : you two are RIDICULOUS  
  
**little lion** : don't hate us cause you aint us hercules  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I can see his stomach from here  
  
**more like HUNKules** : john is smol you can see over him easily  
  
**little lion** : john isn't that smol you and laf are just v v tol  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we're not that tol  
  
**little lion** : six feet is v fucking tol  
  
**more like HUNKules** : you're just v smol  
  
**little lion** : I'm taller than john  
  
**more like HUNKules** : by one inch  
  
**little lion** : you of all people would know that every inch counts  
  
**more like HUNKules** : s t o p  
  
**johnn** : I HATE YOU ALL  
  
**johnn** : MY PHONE WAS GOING  H A M  AND I WAS TRYING TO TALK TO THE LADY WHO IS SUPER NICE BY THE WAY  
  
**little lion** : sORRY  
  
**johnn** : ALSO I AM NOT THAT SMOL  
  
**little lion** : you are  
  
**laf** : v v smol  
  
**johnn** : THIS IS BULLYING  
  
**more like HUNKules** : we love you tho  
  
**johnn** : love you too  
  
**more like HUNKules** : even if you are the smolest  
  
**johnn** : FUCK YOU  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : HERCULES YOU FORGOT TO CARRY ME INTO THE LIVING ROOM  
  
**more like HUNKules** : geT DRESSED  
  
**more like HUNKules** : LIKE AT LEAST A LITTLE  
  
**little lion** : I CANT  
  
**little lion** : W A L K  
  
**more like HUNKules** : do I want to know what that sound was  
  
**little lion** : me diving onto the floor to get my underwear  
  
**more like HUNKules** : COULDNT JOHN HAVE GOTTEN THEM  
  
**johnn** : why would I want to this is funnier  
  
**little lion** : RUDE  
  
**little lion** : HERCULES PLZ  
  
**more like HUNKules** : IM COMING  
  
\---  
  
**little lion** : emporer kuzco was an asshole  
  
**laf** : why are you watching emporers new groove without us  
  
**little lion** : bc you're not here yet  
  
**laf** : we're almost home pause it  
  
**little lion** : okay  
  
**little lion** : john is being a gr8 boyfriend and getting me a drink I love him  
  
**johnn** : evidently your standards for a gr8 boyfriend are not high  
  
**little lion** : MY S/O STANDARDS ARE V V HIGH  
  
**little lion** : and you all meet them v a lot  
  
**little lion** : you're all too good for me I'm so  
  
**laf** : alex  
  
**little lion** : I?????????????  
  
**little lion** : I'm so emotional?????  
  
**laf** : @john do something  
  
**johnn** : I am currently cuddling the shit out of him  
  
**laf** : GOOD  
  
\---  
  
**laf** : hercules  
  
**more like HUNKules** : what  
  
**laf** : they're asleep  
  
**more like HUNKules** : REALLY  
  
**laf** : ye  
  
**more like HUNKules** : do we like carry them to bed or do we leave them on the couch  
  
**laf** : they'll probably wake up if we try  
  
**more like HUNKules** : they're going to wake up from their phones going off  
  
**laf** : I put this chat do not disturb on both of them  
  
**more like HUNKules** : how do you know their passcodes  
  
**laf** : bc they're sappy af  
  
**laf** : alex's is just our birth months except johns is 0 bc his birthday is double digits and john's is all of our last initials  
  
**more like HUNKules** : so alex's is like 1590 and john's is like hllm  
  
**laf** : john's is lmhl  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I wonder if you're first or last  
  
**laf** : we can ask him tomorrow  
  
**laf** : just looking at them makes me tired  
  
**more like HUNKules** : same  
  
**laf** : DONT WALK UP BEHIND ME  
  
**more like HUNKules** : sorry  
  
**more like HUNKules** : wanna just put this food in the fridge and go to bed  
  
**laf** : it's only seven o'clock  
  
**more like HUNKules** : you're swaying babe  
  
**laf** : you never call me babe  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I want to tho

 **laf** : you should

 **more like HUNKules** : then I will  
  
**laf** : yaayyy  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I'll repeat my question  
  
**more like HUNKules** : do you want to put our food in the fridge and go to bed  
  
**laf** : yes  
  
**more like HUNKules** : okay  
  
**laf** : you won't see this until you wake up but goodnight alex and john  
  
**laf** : we love you  
  
**more like HUNKules** : this is so gay  
  
**laf** : yeah that's true  
  
**more like HUNKules** : do you realize that you're still standing in the open doorway or??  
  
**laf** : oh  
  
**more like HUNKules** : let's go to sleep  
  
**laf** : okay  
  
\---  
  
**johnn** : oh my god  
  
**little lion** : that's so CUTE  
  
**laf** : shut up  
  
**little lion** : YOU LOVE US  
  
**laf** : JUDGING BY THE FACT THAT WE'VE BEEN DATING FOR FOUR YEARS AND THAT I TELL YOU THAT I LOVE YOU EVERY SINGLE DAY  
  
**laf** : thE FACT THAT I LOVE YOU SHOULDNT BE SURPRISING  
  
**little lion** : I KNOW BUT ITS STILL NICE TO HEAR YOU SAY IT  
  
**laf** : I h8 you both  
  
**johnn** : no you don't  
  
**johnn** : you ~~~~~~loOOOoOOoOooOoOoOoOoove~~~~~~ us  
  
**laf** : just come to bed and go back to sleep  
  
**johnn** : no way we have a fridge full of chinese food to raid  
  
**laf** : IT IS NINE IN THE MORNING  
  
**little lion** : THAT CAN BE A HEART HEALTHY BREAKFAST  
  
**laf** : N O IT C A N T  
  
**little lion** : IT MAKES MY HEART HAPPY THO  
  
**laf** : SO DO I BUT YET YOU'RE NOT DYING TO BE W/ ME AT NINE IN THE MORNING  
  
**little lion** : YES I AM BUT I ALSO WANT CHINESE FOOD AND YOU DONT LET ME EAT MEALS IN THE BEDROOM ANYMORE  
  
**laf** : spaghetti sauce  
  
**laf** : EVERYWHERE  
  
**little lion** : THAT WAS O NE TIME  
  
**laf** : I WOKE UP IN A POOL OF IT  
  
**little lion** : LET IT GO  
  
**laf** : HOW  
  
**little lion** : WITH AMBITION AND DRIVE  
  
**laf** : I DONT HAVE THAT ANYMORE  
  
**little lion** : hon  
  
**laf** : I  
  
**johnn** : I will eat ALL of this chinese food by myself if you don't come here and stop me  
  
**laf** : I'll get hercules  
  
**little lion** : I still think that I should be allowed to eat meals in our room again  
  
**laf** : NO  
  
**johnn** : NO  
  
**more like HUNKules** : NO  
  
**little lion** : YOU'RE ASLEEP  
  
**more like HUNKules** : NOT ANYMORE  
  
**more like HUNKules** : THE S O U N D  OF YOU T RYING TO SIN IS ENOUGH TO WAKE ME NOW  
  
**little lion** : I OBJECT  
  
**more like HUNKules** : OVERRULED  
  
**little lion** : GAS PS  
  
**johnn** : what part of ALL OF THIS CHINESE FOOD  
  
**johnn** : SINGLE HANDEDLY  
  
**johnn** : did you not get  
  
**little lion** : cOMING  
  
**more like HUNKules** : OMW  
  
**laf** : yeah yeah yeah  
  
**more like HUNKules** : are we really about to have chinese food for breakfast  
  
**little lion** : of course  
  
**more like HUNKules** : just making sure that this isn't all a dream  
  
**little lion** : aWWwwwWwwWWWwwWWwWW we're in your dreams  
  
**more like HUNKules** : you are the only people I spend time with so yeAH  
  
**little lion** : awww I love you hercules  
  
**more like HUNKules** :  love you too  
  
**johnn** : ALL OF THIS CHINESE FOOD  
  
**johnn** : SIN. GLE. HAND. ED. LY.  
  
**more like HUNKules** : I'M COMING G OD  
  
**little lion** : IM LITERALLY SITTING ON THE COUCH  
  
**johnn** : YOUR POINT  
  
**little lion** : SCREAMS  
  
**little lion** : COMING

**Author's Note:**

> I had Chinese food for breakfast this morning,,,,,,


End file.
